I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
