Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
i think i have herpe
just one?
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
