it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Randomize
