butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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