We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
