so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
