i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
