Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
