i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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