He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
