So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
