p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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