I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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