its not stalking. its research.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
