id be glad to
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
