Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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