My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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