I'll bet she douches with gravy.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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