I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
