we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
