Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
