Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
