I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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