Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
