My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
