Your tits are I can't wait for
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
