bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Randomize
