we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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