My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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