i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I see more hoeing in ur future
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Two words: nipple clamps
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