I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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