Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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