why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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