Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
