you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
