Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
