i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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