so explain again why im purple
no
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
