all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
You can't just leave with hair like that
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
