if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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