She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
