$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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