it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
You know, be my cock's hype man.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
