I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
