so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
