so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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