please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Randomize
