did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
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