no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
