I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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