I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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