Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
